Good Grief

The world refuses to stop and grieve for the loved ones we lose. When we lose those most dear to us, the world goes on. Nothing stops. Nothing slows. It doesn’t even apologize. It is really rather rude, just like grief itself. Like an uninvited guest, grief sneaks up unannounced and unexpectedly, demanding to be heard. There is no stopper, no plug, no gate to bar the door to our hearts. Without warning, a song or a scent or a phrase will evoke a memory and, without even a courteous, “Is this a convenient time?” grief will barge in, taking all our attention and demand to be dealt with, whether we want to or not.
If you wrestle with grief long enough, he becomes an old friend – a welcome friend at times, as it was the only place you can still feel the one you have lost. You balanced the fence between knowing you need to move on and fearing that, by doing so, you will forget them.
You eventually find comfort in your times with Grief because it is there you learn the healing is, indeed, in the aching. Mourning and aching become the tools that slowly and ever so surely balm each broken piece of your heart and put it back in place. Different, not the same, but in place, nonetheless. Complete but empty, cracked and forged – but renewed.
It is at that moment you know what love means. It isn’t always the passionate highs or the butterflies you feel. It’s going through hell and coming out wounded and bruised and, when asked, saying you would do it again in a heartbeat. It is remembering the pain and the heartbreak and the struggle – and smiling. Despite the pain and struggle, you stand on the other side of mourning and saying with confidence and a smile, “It was worth it all.”
April Estes,

When we Pray

If we only could see all that happens when we pray, we would do it more often! Here are just a few things that happen when we hit our knees:

1. An angel offers up our prayers to God at God’s altar with a golden censer & much incense.

Rev. 8:3 And another Angel came and stood at the altar, having a golden censer, and much incense was given to Him to offer with the prayers of all the saints upon the golden altar which was before the throne.

Rev. 8:4 And the smoke of the incense went up with the prayers of the saints out of the hand of the Angel before God.

2. Angels are released to work on our behalf as soon as we pray:

Daniel 10:12-13

12 Then he continued, “Do not be afraid, Daniel. Since the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard, and I have come in response to them.

13 But the prince of the Persian kingdom resisted me twenty-one days. Then Michael, one of the chief princes, came to help me, because I was detained there with the king of Persia.

3. The Holy Spirit interprets with groans & moanings for us.

Romans 8:26 “And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words.”

4. Jesus intercedes for us at the right hand of God.

Romans 8:34 “Christ Jesus who died – more than that, who was raised to life-is at the right hand of God, and is also interceding for us.”

5. God sends guidance.

Abraham was sending his servant to find a wife for his son, Isaac, and promised an angel would help him:

Genesis 24:7 “The Lord, the God of heaven…he will send his angel before you so that you can get a wife for my son from there.”

And, just as promised, God sends Rebekah (Isaac’s future wife) just after the servant prayed for the sign.

“15 Before he had finished praying,(AO) Rebekah(AP) came out with her jar on her shoulder. “

Let us ask God to help us remember all this and “see” it in our minds as we go to Him in prayer & pray more!

Sacrifice of Praise

“Worshipping God will always cost us something – from the blood sprinkled altars of the Old Testament to our tithes and time in this present Age…following the Lord is going to cost you SOMETHING, but it’s supposed to. To offer something to the Lord which cost us nothing is not a sacrifice, but merely a gift. Perhaps your act of sacrifice now is to endure a season of sifting. If so, I pray for you. Literally. I pray that all those facing insurmountable odds and unexplainable tribulation will find their peace – and strength – in God and His goodness during this time, so that (like David) your place of sifting can become your place of praise!” -Sifted, April Estes.

Waiting for Heaven

Life can be heavy. There are wounds that sometimes never get healed, things that never get closure. Sometimes it can feel like we’re swimming in a mess of undone things. Things start to get real hairy when we start to try to wield that closure that won’t close, or balm a wound that’s not quite ready yet. Friend, the truth is some things will never be “done”. Some things must wait for heaven. But the good news is heaven is coming! God in His loving kindness had created a place for all the “incompletes” to be made whole. A place where all the wrongs will be made right and all the hurts, restored. If you have become weary from struggling to get that ever elusive healing or closure, let it go, friend. Place it at the feet of God, knowing He can hold it all til heaven. As the song goes “Earth has no sorrow that heaven can’t heal!”


There are certain words as a writer I just love: undaunted, saudade, picturesque…

Lately, I’ve another favorite word has been emerging a lot. Sometimes it comes as “pining,” sometimes “longing,” but it comes around at least every other day.

As the days grow longer in this quarentine, disease ridden world, I feel my soul and heart longing, yearning, pining for heaven. At least once a week, I pour my heart out begging for Christ to come, already.

Have you ever felt that way? Maybe you were a fiance, longing for marriage or a soldier yearning for home. There’s something almost tangible about extreme pining.

We aren’t the only ones to pine for something. Hannah yearned for a child of her own. Leah longed to be loved. Joseph pined for Canaan. In all cases, it would have been easy to give up, stop wanting. But they didn’t. Despite the hunger, they remained faithful, and continually prayed for their needs. Philippians 4:6-7 tells us “Don’t worry about anything, but pray and petition every situation with thanksgiving, presenting your requests to God. And the Peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.” Note what it says: if we pray with thanksgiving, God will give us His peace! We might not always get everything we are praying for (Leah and Joseph didn’t), but we will be given the peace to withstand the journey.

Are you pining today? Take it to God, in prayer. He promises peace.

Heap Burning Coals

There is a verse that has often perplexed me: “If your enemy hungers, feed him; If he thirsts, give water to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head, And the LORD will repay you.” (Proverbs 25:22–23). It made no sense because I was reading it through Americanized lenses. But to get to the true message of this verse, we must view it through New Testament eyes.

Back then, the fire was the hub of the home and stayed lit 24/7. If one’s fire went out, it could mean death for the family. If one’s fire ever did go out, they would ask for coals from their neighbor, causing a feeling of indebtedness. This view makes way more sense, now. God is not saying if you treat your neighbor well, it will hurt him. Rather, it will cause him to feel closer to you. A better interpretation (done in 1903 by Ferrar Fenton) would read: “If your enemy hungers, feed him; If he thirsts, give water to drink, And a fire besides for his needs; And then the LORD will repay you.” (Proverbs 25:22–23). This also lines up with the example in Job where God replenished Job’s children and wealth only AFTER he prayed for his enemies. When we let the blessings flow, God’s blessings flow to us.

American Dream Fail

Living in America is a blessing. We have freedom of religion, freedom of speech, freedom upon freedom upon freedom. We are told from a young age we can be whatever and whoever we want to be. We are then told we need to be and have everything – all the time. It’s a lot of pressure. It’s also a lie.

If you buy into all this, you will have conflicts. You can’t have everything you want all the time. It wouldn’t be healthy. You can’t be everything to everybody all the time. You would be “spent” in a couple of weeks. And as a Christian, we are taught to Deny ourselves, not indulge ourselves. Living as a Christian in America sometimes makes you feel like you have failed the American dream.

To have the dream job, you must sometimes be away from your family, sometimes totally. Which priority wins? You feel like you are failing yourself if you don’t pursue “ all you can be,” but you fail your family if you’re never there. No matter what you choose, you feel like you are failing one.

We are told from the time we are young to “be happy.” But what if “being happy” falls outside the will of God? What if we have to choose between personal happiness and following Christ?

I have wrestled with it and I know many others have, too. It is difficult to choose wisely when the world is screaming for us to do otherwise. No matter what we choose, we feel like we are failing. Let us pray for God to give us the strength to choose wisely and tune out the voices that say differently.

Do you Want to be Well?

Jesus was once in Jerusalem for a Jewish festival when he passed the pool of Bethesda. This pool was special because at a certain season, an angel would dip into the pool and whoever was first to step in was healed. Jesus noticed a lame man who had been by the pool for 38 years. Jesus then asks him a strange question, “Do you want to get well?” I always wondered about this question. But miracles are used to illustrate spiritual truths. Jesus asks him if he wants to get well because to be well would require a total change in his way of life. He would say goodbye to the way he used to live, waiting by a pool as a cripple, and enter society. It would be wonderful, but it would be hard. The same is true for us. When we say goodbye to our old life of sin, life is very different, sometimes harder. But, just as it was worth it to the lame man, so it is with us. In the same way, Jesus stands before us, asking “Do you want to be well?”

Pure in Heart

“Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.” Matthew 5:8

There is a saying in our culture, “Follow your heart.” It sounds nice and makes for neat home decor signs, but, unfortunately for the Christian, it is not accurate. Jeremiah 17:9 says, “The heart is deceitful above all things…” The Bible indicates the heart is something not to blindly follow, but to tame and guide. As Christians, we are not called to “find ourselves” but to “deny ourselves.”

So, how do we develop a pure heart? Psalm 12:6 says, “The fear of the Lord is pure.” Psalm 119:9 says, “How can a person stay pure? By living according to Your Word.” Psalm 20:11 says, “Even small children are known by their conduct, if their heart is really pure and upright.” Proverbs 15:26 says, “God detests the thoughts of the wicked, but gracious words are pure in his sight.” We can see through these verses that by living according to God’s word and watching our conduct and our words we can develop a pure heart. And there’s good reason! Psalms 24:4-5 says those with pure hearts will “receive a blessing from the Lord” and “righteousness unto salvation.” We are also told in Matthew 5 the pure in heart will see God and that our purity is the “fine linen of the righteous deeds of the saints.”

The bad news? One of the ways we are made pure is through tests and trials (Proverbs 17:3). Sometimes God puts us through the refiner’s fire to rid us of impurities and make us shine. Don’t fret the unwarranted trials and tests, friend. It is all a part of the journey.