Good Grief

The world refuses to stop and grieve for the loved ones we lose. When we lose those most dear to us, the world goes on. Nothing stops. Nothing slows. It doesn’t even apologize. It is really rather rude, just like grief itself. Like an uninvited guest, grief sneaks up unannounced and unexpectedly, demanding to be heard. There is no stopper, no plug, no gate to bar the door to our hearts. Without warning, a song or a scent or a phrase will evoke a memory and, without even a courteous, “Is this a convenient time?” grief will barge in, taking all our attention and demand to be dealt with, whether we want to or not.
If you wrestle with grief long enough, he becomes an old friend – a welcome friend at times, as it was the only place you can still feel the one you have lost. You balanced the fence between knowing you need to move on and fearing that, by doing so, you will forget them.
You eventually find comfort in your times with Grief because it is there you learn the healing is, indeed, in the aching. Mourning and aching become the tools that slowly and ever so surely balm each broken piece of your heart and put it back in place. Different, not the same, but in place, nonetheless. Complete but empty, cracked and forged – but renewed.
It is at that moment you know what love means. It isn’t always the passionate highs or the butterflies you feel. It’s going through hell and coming out wounded and bruised and, when asked, saying you would do it again in a heartbeat. It is remembering the pain and the heartbreak and the struggle – and smiling. Despite the pain and struggle, you stand on the other side of mourning and saying with confidence and a smile, “It was worth it all.”
April Estes,

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