A New Hope

Today I stopped hoping.
It has been three years since I had COVID & was stripped of my sense of smell. Thankfully, some has returned – but much has not. Peanut butter and coffee still taste like sawdust. And my favorite seasonal past time of smelling all the new scents at Bath & Body works? Can’t smell a thing. And what I can smell, I know is distorted. So, I would visit a store and walk away empty handed and sad – knowing my sniffer was “off.”
Maybe you’ve been there: stuck between what WAS and what IS. To let go of something you once desired so much is almost unimaginable, like the death of a dream. And what lies before you? It Doesn’t seem as good. I stayed stuck, too.
Until today.
Today I collected all the perfumes I could actually smell and made myself choose one. Notice that word “made.” Because, honestly, I didn’t want to. I didn’t want the new fragrances that were total opposite of what i normally would’ve picked. I wanted to return to my old, familiar perfumes – only they didn’t suit me anymore. What WAS was no longer. I was forced with the choice of getting a perfume I couldn’t even smell or choosing something new – in faith – that met my needs NOW.
Maybe the reason stepping out in faith is so hard is because we are saying goodbye to the familiar – trusting with a mere mustard seed of faith that what lies ahead will not fail us, based on nothing but a new hope. But you know what I learned? Choosing what you need NOW hurts less than hoping for something that will probably never be. I pray we all have the bravery to step out in faith to try something new! Even if it means being content in the discontent. sweetmimosa.blog